Hollow

I'm feeling really hollow

Like a shell

So much has gone

What is left is fragile

I feel broken, I'm breaking 

All alone, leaking

I've cried so much I'm bleeding

From wiping my eyes so many times

So often

There is no way to explain how empty I feel

Like my void is filled to the brim with hurt

The more I cry the more hollow I become 

I give all my love away

I don't want to hurt those around me

At the same time I need help

But I've asked too many times and feel guilty

I have nothing left to give.

For those that have been there for me

I thank you

And those that I thought would be have hurt me more.

I don't blame anyone for how I feel

They're my feelings and I have to live with them

I now know where I stand.

I'm not afraid to stand alone

I've spent so long standing there 

But at the same time I tire

Like a stone in the rain

I slowly crumble

No One Like You

We share a bond, it's true
I love you more than life itself
I only hope you knew!

That I would've done anything
I would've given you everything
Anything you'd ever ask for
Not that you'd ever ask or even let me give.

You are one of a kind
There's no one else like you
Not here or anywhere
Nor will there ever be another you.

We shared the most amazing times together
Laughed at what could only ever be laughed at
Shared with each other our kindness and hearts
Forever connected, they'll never part.

Like a soldier you fought until your last breath
And gave everyone you knew in life a bit of yourself
Sharing with us memories of you traveling the world
Dancing on stages, sharing culture and gaining respect in a time when there was all but none.

You're a true warrior of our time
I'm glad you had time and a place to shine
In our hearts and memories you now live on
Till tomorrow comes and we meet again,
I love you Uncle, farewell.

Thankful

All the amazing people in my life
Influence me at different times.
Sometimes in subtle flowing motion
Picking me up when I fall too.

Slightly effecting each others being
By our presence in each others lives.
Influencing daily choices by conversations had.

Each day's a new day
A story yet to unfold
Another way of sharing love
To the ones we treasure most.

I can't imagine life
If not for my wonderful friends, family and acquaintances.
For without them my life wouldn't be the same.

It would be a life not lived
With cherished memories not made
Without love shared with my nearest and dearest.
An experience not yet had.

I'd like to thank the special people in my life
For sharing with me yours.
The fun times and joy, the heart ache and pain
All of which is mine and yours.

I'm thankful for each and everyone of you
Every single day
And I look forward to our next experience
Here's to more memories made.

Down To Rest

Life is short, too short sometimes.
I'm sure you lived your life well.
Unfortunately your life has been taken away.
So young, down to rest you lay.

Your life was a privilege we've all been blessed with.
You'll never know how you've touched our hearts.

It must've been hard knowing all this time.
You were destined to live such a short life.

May the memories live on and the pain subside.
You'll always be with me in my thoughts as a child.
When we were close and happy, not a care in the world.
In the countryside we played until the sunset low.

Now you're in the sky shinning down bright.
Twinkling like a star on our dark nights.
Keeping an eye out if anything goes down.
We know you are watching till we meet again.

Love you my Cuz!!!

Jaded

Here's a song I wrote about 5 years ago called Jaded. It's one of my favourite songs I've written. I've performed this a few times and will hopefully record it soon.

Enjoy ;)


I once was here but now I've gone
Far away to find myself again
So many lies and so much deceit
Not just in the home but also on the streets
But now I've gone
I don't need it anymore
I once had a life but now it's faded
Listening to everyone's thoughts so jaded.

I'm leaving this I know this is not what I want
I don't wanna spend my life being someone that I'm not
It's not right and I refuse to do so
I'm leaving you, I'm leaving this
Get out of my way before you get dismissed.

I once was here but now I've gone
I gave you all a chance but you all did me wrong
Whenever I feel pain it's when I'm with you
I know it's time to move on and that's what I'm going to do.

I once was here but now I've gone
I gave you all a chance but you all did me wrong
I've done nothing bad to you but none of you care
You only want what's good for you so you step everywhere.

You step on my life, you step on my joy
Try to cover it up like you had no choice
But I know you did, I'm not stupid
I know how it works that's why I stopped you when I did.

I've been good.
I've been nicer than nice trying to help everybody out
But it's so so hard, it's like they want me but they still push me away
So I tried the best I could. (but was it enough).

I once was here but now I've gone
Far away to find myself again
So many lies and so much deceit
Not just in the home but also on the streets
But now I've gone
I don't need it anymore
I once had a life but now it's faded
Listening to everyone's thoughts so jaded......

Jaded, Bitter & Twisted

I'm sick of playing all these games with you.
I'm sick of trying to pretend that I give a shit.
I used to care and sometimes I do
But I'm not waiting 'round to be talked about and abused
(it's not my thing)

I'm not trying to be everything
Just trying to be the best person I can
Through all the sticks & stones you & others throw
I get bruised & I bleed but I still try to be me
(it's hard)

With all these expectations placed on us in this modern world
With all the competition at our doors
While the world becomes so Jaded, Bitter & Twisted
It's hard too, not to become these.

I was never like this & I don't want to become like others have in previous years
While people fall over the ledge & things crumble down around me
I refuse to become Jaded & bitter & twisted & try
I try to be the same sweet child I used to be

I'm not trying to be everything
I'm just trying to be real & feel emotions
While it hurts being lied about & being kicked when your down
Reputations at stake, I just try to be real (I just try to be me)

It's hard while everything's falling down around me
And it's hard when I'm being knocked down by debre
These situations & outside influences I can't control
Seem to be trying to take me down but I refuse to fall
(if I fall I'll get back up)

I'm not trying to be everything
I'm just trying to do my best day to day
Though I may dance, write, act & sing
Though I may model, look good and everything
I'm just trying to be myself
I'm just doing the things I enjoy
Without harm or conflict to any other person
I am no one else
I'm not trying to fit in.


A song I wrote....

28/04/2007

Daily Business

Painful times are shared by all
Not everyone has a good day
Accidents happen daily
To anyone anywhere, everyone everywhere.

People are called to right wrongs
Others are asked to go home
While some are strong and deal with issues
The rest break down and cry.

Nobody knows why different people act differently
Why people seem to cope with tradgety easily
And why people pass out at the thought of an injection
When a simple thing could save your life.

It's hard to determine how one will act when faced with a new situation.
Is written in script, a prophecy destined to occur?
Imprinted in our bones, our skin, in our fate?
Or is it simply a chemical reaction in our brain?
Who knows?

Should we ask questions if we are unsure?
Or should we sit and wait for the answer to come?
Will the answer come if we wait
Or should we scout the answers from their homes and intrude on their daily business?

Well what?....

Who knows?!!!